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| "Johnny Betts is a rude 'abnoxious' jerk who needs to be 'punced' in the face."- A grammatically-challenged non-fan |
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MOVIE HORROR STORIESby Janell I finally have a movie story to share now thanks to one idiot. I'm not sure how often this happens, but apparently this guy thought he was being original. My husband and I went to see The Dark Knight on a Friday night so the theater was pretty crowded. Everyone was into the movie and on their best theater behavior though. There was hardly any out of place talking and no cell phones going off ... except one moron thought it was a good opportunity to show off how funny he was. The whole movie was pretty intense and everyone was concentrating on it. But during the part where Bruce Wayne opens the door to an apartment and walks in, some moron in the audience yelled, "Lucy, I'm home!" There were a few questioning gasps as people were pulled away from the movie, but no one laughed. It wasn't necessary to call him a loser because the lack of laughter must have made the point for him. He didn't offer any comedic attempts after that. What's sad is that I can't help but think he'd seen the movie before and had been planning his comedic breakthrough ever since. Johnny: There's no doubt he sat concocted that little quip sometime prior to that night. Unfortunately, like I adeptly pointed out in my award-winning article It's a Movie, Not a DVD Commentary Tryout, there are way too many wannabe "comedians" filling our theaters. I'll quote myself: "[I]t's quite unnecessary for you to try to lighten the mood. For example, if there is a creepy knock on someone's door, then don't feel pressured to yell out something like, 'Strip-o-gram!' or 'Pizza delivery!' I know this probably goes over really well in your own mind (which explains why you're laughing so hard at yourself), but the fact that nobody else is laughing at you just means your shrewd social commentary on door knocking flew over everybody else's head. Save yourself the trouble of sitting at home thinking up witty little one-liners." Moral of the Story: Sit down. Shut up. Watch the movie. I'm copyrighting that phrase and puttin' it on t-shirts! Send your stories to me and let the whole world know just how dangerous going to the movies can be. |
HOME PAGE  Yes Man Transporter 3 Four Christmases Twilight Quantum of Solace Ghouls Eagle Eye Righteous Kill Tropic Thunder  Weekend Results: 1. Watchmen($55,214,334) 2. Tyler Perry's Madea Goes to Jail($8,532,412) 3. Taken($7,334,814) 4. Slumdog Millionaire($6,808,383) 5. Paul Blart: Mall Cop($4,146,316) |
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